Things you most probably didn’t know about premature ejaculation

Hi Readers!

This week’s article is about premature ejaculation. 

There are psychological and physical causes for premature ejaculation. It is important to speak to your doctor first to investigate any physical conditions. The doctor may then refer you to a sex therapist/Sexologist to help with the psychological aspect.

The NHS quotes a study involving 500 couples that found that the average time for ejaculation was about 5 1/2 minutes after starting sex. This time could be longer for men who have sex with men. The NHS states that international guidelines define premature ejaculation as regularly ejaculating within 1 minute of entering your partner. 

That being said, each couple is different and each couple ‘decides’ if this is okay for them or is cause for an issue. If this is the case for you and/or your couple, you should speak to your doctor or make an appointment with a counsellor who specialises in sexual health.

If you want to consider medication or creams please speak to your GP or Pharmacist.

In the meantime, here are some tools and exercises that you can try:

  • use a thick condom to help decrease sensation
  • take a deep breath to briefly shut down the ejaculatory reflex (an automatic reflex of the body during which ejaculation occurs)
  • have sex with your partner on top (to allow them to pull away when you are close to ejaculating)
  • take breaks during sex and think about something that diverts your mind from sexual activity

Exercises to do as a couple:

– In the “squeeze technique”, your partner masturbates you, but stops before the point of ejaculation and squeezes the head of your penis for between 10-20 seconds. They then let go and wait for another 30 seconds before resuming masturbation. This process is carried out several times before ejaculation is allowed to occur.

– The Stop-go technique is similar, but your partner does not squeeze your penis. Once you feel more confident about delaying ejaculation, you and your partner can begin to have sex, stopping and starting as required.

These techniques may sound simple, but they require lots of practice.

You can also try pelvic floor exercises Weak pelvic floor muscles might impair your ability to delay ejaculation. Pelvic floor exercises (Kegel exercises) can help strengthen these muscles.

To perform these exercises:

  • Find the right muscles: To identify your pelvic floor muscles, stop urination in midstream or tighten the muscles that keep you from passing gas. These manoeuvres use your pelvic floor muscles. Once you’ve identified your pelvic floor muscles, you can do the exercises in any position, although you might find it easier to do them lying down at first.
  • Perfect your technique: Tighten your pelvic floor muscles, hold the contraction for three seconds, and then relax for three seconds. Try it a few times in a row. When your muscles get stronger, try doing Kegel exercises while sitting, standing or walking.
  • Maintain your focus: For best results, focus on tightening only your pelvic floor muscles. Be careful not to flex the muscles in your abdomen, thighs or buttocks. Avoid holding your breath. Instead, breathe freely during the exercises.
  • Repeat 3 times a day: Aim for at least three sets of 10 repetitions a day.

I hope this has given you some insight into premature ejaculation.

Be kind to one another,

Julia, Sexologist